I did it again

I worked out today, I did a lot of great stuff that would have made myself happy, but I wasn’t happy. So I cut. Again. I was clean for 4 days and now I’m back on zero.

I got a little dizzy at first, but didn’t stop doing it. But, still, I’m doing just little cuts. Today I cut again in the same place I did before, in one of my legs. So I guess people won’t see if I keep cutting in the same spots, right? And specially if they’re small spots. Anyway, I hope tomorrow’s a better day.

tags cutting depression I'm tired of doing this self harmer scared little girl

3 months ago on 15 February 2012 at 5:58pm 1 note

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I guess I'm just looking for salvation. Or maybe I'm looking for something to save or someone to blame. My life's a mess, just like the way I'm a mess. I'm complicated and full of flaws. I'm sure you don't want me by your side. But here I am, I'm living to provoke the world. Sometimes I wish I was dead, but don't we all? Life's better if we're not living. It looks better, it tastes better. But I made a promise to myself. And I'm not letting go. I'm not leaving.